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Presidents Message
- Welfare-Free Zone? Look Again!
Bonnie D. Parkin, General
Relief Society President
Sister
Parkin's complete talk can be found on the Church
website at:
http://lds.org/library/display/0,4945,5209-1-2176-9,00.html
In July of
1947—before many of you were born—Mae and Henry Matis
were called to go to Finland. It was right after World
War II and every nation was still reeling from the
carnage. Let me share with you their story. Brother
Matis writes:
“We were living in the university ward in Chicago. Mae
was the ward Relief Society president and had committed
to the stake Relief Society president that the ward
would make six quilts for the general welfare storage
department in Salt Lake.
“The sisters had made five of the quilts and had run out
of material. This was during wartime and everyone was
having a hard time making ends meet. Mae asked the stake
Relief Society president if the five quilts would be
acceptable, but Sister Williams challenged her and the
ward to try to make that sixth quilt, which they did out
of odds and ends of material. Then, to make it look as
nice as possible, Mae took our daughter’s plaid skirt
and bound the quilt with it and sent off all six quilts
to Welfare Square.”
It was two years later, on Mother’s Day of 1947, that
President George Albert Smith went to Chicago and asked
Brother and Sister Matis if they would accept a call to
Finland and open up the mission there. Brother Matis
continues: “We packed enough clothing, bedding, and food
to sustain us in that war-torn country. On arrival in
Helsinki we found that most of our supplies had been
stolen during shipment. I sent to Salt Lake for more
supplies as we needed clothing and bedding and we felt
there might be some in the general welfare storage. When
the supplies arrived in Helsinki by boat, we anxiously
started to open boxes. On the top of the very first box
we opened was that sixth quilt. This assured us that the
Lord really did want us to be in Finland.”1
Now sisters, this is not a call to make quilts! It’s a
call to recognize the power of the welfare program of
the Church. Both the giver and the receiver are blessed
by serving the Lord in such righteousness. Welfare is
significant because it is the Lord’s work. Welfare is
expansive; it is much more than a food order, a canning
assignment, or a year’s supply.
Extending meaningful welfare
service begins with two elements—vision and love. We
need to understand our priesthood leaders’ vision of
welfare in our corner of the vineyard—a vision we can
help shape through established councils. We also need to
have a personal love for those we are privileged to
serve and an understanding of their individual needs and
wants. In preparing this message, I went to the
Church Handbook of Instructions,
Book 2, to see the direction we’ve been given on
welfare. I received new insight into my duties as the
Relief Society general president. I also looked again at
what was there for you as stake and ward Relief Society
presidencies. I hope you, too, are turning to the
handbook for both instruction and inspiration.
Listen to the “job description” for my calling:
“Under the direction of the First Presidency and Quorum
of the Twelve, members of the Relief Society general
presidency counsel regularly with priesthood advisers
and bring forward matters pertaining to women and
families. They also serve on the General Welfare
Committee.”2
And by appointment from the First Presidency, we also
serve on the Welfare Executive Committee, which is the
operational arm of Church welfare. Sisters, with the
troubles and challenges that face women and families,
please know that our voice in the General Welfare
Committee is both heard and appreciated.
You know, it’s an interesting triangle—priesthood
leaders, Relief Society leaders, and the welfare
committee—with the major connection being the “matters
pertaining to women and families.”3
As Relief Society leaders, we must be concerned with the
welfare—or well-being—of women and families. We must be
anxiously engaged in bringing forward their needs to
priesthood leaders. How do we do that? Let
me give you an example.
The Relief Society general
presidency and all general auxiliary leaders travel
across the world to meet, teach, and listen to Saints
everywhere. I like to call this global visiting
teaching! After each visit, we meet as a presidency to
discuss what we heard and learned about the needs of the
Saints in that area. Recently, we realized that
auxiliary leaders everywhere were sharing a similar
concern—they were not meeting regularly with their
priesthood leaders in councils, and they were not
receiving training or support in matters of welfare.
And so, as my counselors and I met, we not only
discussed our concerns, we also prayerfully sought
solutions. After counseling together, we were ready to
take both our concerns and our recommendations to our
priesthood leaders. Ours just happen to be President
Hinckley, President Monson, and President Faust.
(Somehow that’s just a bit more daunting than when I was
a ward Relief Society president!)
In our regular meeting with the First Presidency, we
shared what we had learned from listening to sisters
around the world—that they don’t have a regular time to
meet with priesthood leaders, and they desire more
training and support in welfare. We asked the Brethren
how we could help priesthood leaders understand the
importance of training their Relief Society leaders in
welfare principles and practices. Of course, we had our
suggestions ready, but before we could express them,
President Hinckley responded, “Well, sisters, I can
address that in the Worldwide Leadership Training
Meeting this Saturday.” (Mind you, it was Wednesday!)
And, if you saw that broadcast, you know that he did!
Listen to what President Hinckley said in that meeting:
“To you stake presidents and bishops, we plead with you
to give encouragement and help in every possible way to
the women and the girls of your stakes and wards. They
need your priesthood backing. They need your leadership
and counsel. Help them in every way that you can, and
while doing so you will help yourselves.
“For instance, it is imperative that bishops work
closely with Relief Society presidents in administering
Church welfare. This is normally accomplished in the
monthly ward welfare committee meeting or, on occasion,
in the ward council meeting. But emergencies arise, or
there may be circumstances where greater confidentiality
is required, in which case the bishop and the Relief
Society president should consult together. Wherever
there is material need in a family, the Relief Society
president is best qualified to go into the home and
assess the family’s needs.”4
Did you see how this happened? First, we sought
out the welfare needs of women and families through
personal visits. Next, we discussed as a presidency what
we had learned, and prayed for guidance with potential
solutions. Then, we met with our priesthood leaders to
seek their counsel. Finally, we found a solution,
and good things happened.
We’ve heard from many of you that these words of our
prophet have given new emphasis, insight, and direction
to you and your priesthood leaders. Welfare has been
central to the gospel from the very early days of the
Church. President Harold B. Lee, who was pivotal in
shaping the Church welfare program as we know it today,
expressed the importance of men and women joining
together to address welfare needs when he said:
“Priesthood plus womanhood together bring exaltation!
Priesthood plus womanhood is necessary in welfare.
Without this teamwork, never in the world would we
accomplish what we are doing in the welfare program.”5
Stake Relief Society Leaders
Let’s put President Lee’s direction to work on a local
level. As stake Relief Society leaders, what
does the handbook say about your welfare
responsibilities?
“Members of the stake Relief Society presidency direct
the efforts of the stake Relief Society to accomplish
the Relief Society's purpose and objectives.”6
After reading this, I went back and studied our Relief
Society objectives. The welfare messages jumped out at
me. Objective four—“strengthen and protect
families”—encourages provident living and wise home
management. How are you helping wards meet this
objective? Objective five—“serve and support each
sister”—is just another way of saying welfare. Listen to
some of these words: “Relief Society helps sisters feel
needed, included, valued, and loved regardless of their
personal circumstances.” Objective three—“exercise
charity and nurture those in need.”7
Welfare again. Sisters, as I read and reflected on our
objectives, it became clear to me that much of our work
in Relief Society is about welfare. I encourage you
to study the purpose and objectives of our beloved
organization because they, like the scriptures, teach us
of eternal truths. There aren’t many places you can
go in this world and receive that kind of divine
clarity. The more we review and study our objectives,
the more we will recognize the strength and direction
they give us. Welfare is woven throughout our
objectives.
In addition to our objectives, stake Relief Society
presidents are charged with the responsibility to “serve
as a resource to ward Relief Society presidencies,” to
“instruct and advise individual presidencies as
requested by the ward or directed by the stake
presidency,” and to “occasionally visit ward Relief
Society meetings and activities to give support and
ensure that the organization is functioning properly.”8
How do these assignments address welfare? Let me share
with you what one stake Relief Society presidency is
doing to be a welfare resource to the 12 wards in their
stake.
The first Tuesday of each month the stake Relief Society
presidency makes visits with a ward Relief Society
presidency. Each ward is asked to make appointments with
eight less-active sisters or with sisters who have
special needs. The stake Relief Society secretary
coordinates all of the scheduling. The stake and ward
presidencies meet together, have prayer, then divide up
with their counterpart. Each pair takes two names, and
they visit those sisters together.
Listen to the results of these visits. The stake Relief
Society president observed: “This experience has given
us one-on-one time with our ward counterparts. We
recognize and appreciate the importance of making home
visits. Because of these home visits, we are more likely
to seek out and show love and acceptance to those in
need and to our less-active sisters. We are seeing our
ward presidencies scheduling more visits because they
have seen and felt some success. Some ward presidency
members have expressed fear of being out of their
comfort zone when making these visits. But after going
with her stake counterpart, fears disappeared.”9
Home visits should be a joyful and rewarding part of
your calling.
There is one more welfare responsibility that I want to
mention. As a stake Relief Society presidency you serve
on the stake welfare committee. You see—up close and
personal—the needs and resources of the stake. Clearly,
there is power in meeting and counseling together. Let
me give you a snapshot of what’s happening in a stake
welfare committee in the Midwest. The stake Relief
Society president writes:
“Among the Relief Society, welfare is commonly spoken of
in terms of reactively providing food and supplies for
families in need. Often we are in reactive mode
because the crises we handle are so enormous. Because of
this, less emphasis is given to proactive employment and
emergency preparedness.
Health and wellness
aren’t immediately thought of by our sisters as being
part of welfare. But from a proactive standpoint, as a
stake Relief Society presidency, we feel they certainly
are and encourage use of Enrichment meetings as the best
place to teach welfare skills.”10
Can you relate with these
challenges? Have you overlooked health and
wellness as important welfare needs? It’s exciting
to hear the solutions that came from this stake welfare
committee. Because of their stake president’s
vision, each ward and branch was challenged to assemble
a Welfare Spreadsheet Chart
that contained three columns. The first column listed
the name of the family, the second column the assigned
home teachers, and the third column the visiting
teachers. Ward welfare committees were encouraged
to have these spreadsheets in front of each committee
member in every meeting so that discussions and
decisions would include the resources of both home and
visiting teachers.
Do you see how having this information could help you
share ideas to meet needs before assistance is
necessary? Do you see how good information can
help you be a proactive participant in council meetings?
I hope you will begin to see welfare differently.
I hope you will see beyond food orders and will leave
being proactive. Every Relief Society in this
Church has needs that can be addressed in advance.
Visiting teaching can help us to be proactive. Six
months ago we talked about visiting teaching as being
the heart and soul of Relief Society. Why is it the
heart and soul? Because visiting teaching helps us
know our sisters, know their needs, and know the
contributions they can make to the Lord’s storehouse so
all will be blessed.
We use that term—“the Lord’s storehouse”—but what does
it mean? The concept of the storehouse and the Church
Welfare Services emerged from revelations given to the
Prophet Joseph Smith beginning in 1831, a year after the
Church was organized. In Doctrine and Covenants
section 42, Church members were directed to “remember
the poor, and consecrate their properties for the poor's
support.”11
The goods and money thus contributed were to be “kept in
the Lord's storehouse, to administer to the poor and the
needy”12
under the direction of the local presiding leader.
We work under that same direction today.
Can you imagine what would happen if a stake welfare
committee meeting started with a question like this:
“Where do we desire to grow with respect to welfare in
our stake?” This mid-western stake that I spoke
about a moment ago realized they hadn’t give enough
emphasis to the chronic problems of underemployment and
job search. They did their homework. They knew
that 80% of their sisters were single. They also
learned that 90% of the women in the stake worked
outside the home. Underemployment was a huge issue not
only for the sisters but also for the brothers.
Their answer to the
underemployment problem was to include
computer literacy as
one of their 2004 welfare goals.
Sisters, you have heard me say this before, but do you
see how good information makes for good inspiration?
Part of that good information is knowing your stake
president’s vision of welfare. I asked one stake
Relief Society president what her stake president’s
vision of welfare was. She said that she wasn’t
sure she had ever heard him express it, but she did know
of his deep concerns for the spiritual well-being and
the employment of stake members. Sisters, what are
the concerns of your priesthood leaders? When you
know this, you will be in a better position to assist
them in helping sisters and families come unto Christ.
Ward Relief Society Leaders
If you are a ward Relief Society leader, please stand.
You are where the rubber hits the road. One of our
senior sister missionaries who served in the London
South Mission shared this tender story with me. I’ve
never forgotten it. I hope you will feel something as I
share it. I believe it expresses the great work of
Relief Society leaders in making a difference in the
lives of those they love and serve.
“It was in January that my husband left all of us just a
month after my sixth child was born. I thought he was
going to Michigan to check out a job but he never came
back. I pleaded for four years, hoping that he would
reconsider, and instead he sent me divorce papers.
“It was in August of that year, the day before my oldest
son’s 14th birthday, that my young Relief Society
president and my neighbor, who was my visiting teacher,
came to see how I was getting along. We talked for a
while until they sincerely asked me how I was. I broke
down in tears because I wanted to do something for my
son and I couldn’t even make him a birthday cake. They
comforted me, then checked my cupboards and refrigerator
and found them all totally empty. I had used all of my
food storage in seven and a half months. I never
received any money from my ex-husband, and my bills were
behind because my savings were gone. The next day I had
a bishop’s order, and my Relief Society president took
me to the bishops’ storehouse, where she made sure I
received all that I needed, including material to make a
shirt for my son and ingredients for a cake. It was hard
to accept help from the Church. When the bishop called
my family to ask them to help me financially they
couldn’t—they had no means to help me. The bishop asked
me to work on the Church welfare farm. My older children
and I did this during the growing season.
“The bishop met with me every week to make sure I could
meet my payments, and with his help we were able to work
things out. I went to work at night to help as much as I
could. The bishop encouraged me to go to school and get
a higher education. I waited until my youngest child was
three before consenting to do so. I received a full
tuition grant, and in three and a half years I had my
bachelor’s degree in elementary education.”13
The story doesn’t end here. This dear sister
subsequently remarried and her six children and his
eight children became a united family! After the death
of her husband 17 years later, she chose to serve a
mission, and she continues to serve. She is currently
serving her fourth mission as a single sister.
Sisters, do you see the
circular miracle of the
welfare plan? This sister and her children were
receivers, but when her self-confidence and
self-reliance were restored, she became and continues to
be a giver. A devoted Relief Society president—that’s
you, sisters—working with a bishop who understood his
responsibility, and a receiver—our dear sister
missionary—who was willing to work made this happen.
Elder Glen L. Rudd, a former member of the First Quorum
of the Seventy, has expressed, “The poor of the Church
need leaders who are understanding and patient. Charity,
the pure love of Christ, must be in the heart of every
bishop and Relief Society president.”14
Charity is what Relief Society is
all about. We work within the bonds of charity at every
level. The handbook states that “members of the ward
Relief Society presidency minister to sisters in the
ward. . . . They seek out
and assist sisters who are in need.”15
What does seek out mean? It’s not just assisting with
the temporal needs of food, clothing, and shelter—it’s
also seeking out those with spiritual needs. Welfare
means both temporal and spiritual well-being.
I hope you are seeking out those young adult women who
are transitioning into Relief Society. Their talents and
skills will make an important contribution to the Lord’s
storehouse. I hope transition is a priority. Know your
young adult sisters; include them, mentor them, be able
to make an accounting to your priesthood leaders about
them. Take care of their spiritual and temporal
well-being. We are losing too many of them. They need
Relief Society, and Relief Society needs them.
I’m reminded of a ward Relief Society president who,
when I asked her how things were going, replied, “We
have a great ward. We don’t have any welfare needs.” I
was struck by the relief in her voice! Sisters, every
ward has welfare needs. I believe every person does too!
At times in our lives we are all in want either
spiritually or temporally. If you believe you live in a
welfare-free zone, I ask you to look again! No ward is
without welfare needs. Seek out those in spiritual need.
An effective way to do this is to sit as a presidency in
the front of the room during your Sunday meetings. I
know as you observe the sisters in your ward you will
receive inspiration about their spiritual and temporal
well-being. I know of a Relief Society president who
carries a roster in her purse, and when she has a minute
she ponders the names of the sisters in her ward. I
promise as you ponder and pray about your sisters that
the Lord will help you discern both their spiritual and
temporal needs.
I’d like to say a few words
about temporal needs. As ward Relief Society
leaders you are in a great position to bless the lives
of sisters and their families. Our fourth objective,
“strengthen and protect families,”16
talks about provident living and wise home management.
Are you teaching provident living and home management
skills? I ask this question because as I recently
visited with some young adult sisters, they mentioned
the need for an Enrichment meeting on “the things my
mother never taught me.” These young adult women wanted
to know how to hem a skirt, make a casserole, and use a
budget. I guess my question is, “Do their mothers know
how to do this?” If they don’t, what can you do to
provide opportunities for them to learn these skills and
teach them to their daughters?
In addition, have mothers in your wards and stakes who
are preparing a daughter or son to serve a mission
taught them how to sew on a button, mend a pair of
pants, or wash their clothes? Home instruction in
provident living will bless future missionaries. They
will enter the mission field able to live within a
budget and manage their living allowance and, hopefully,
at the conclusion of their mission, be able to do as one
wonderful elder in our mission did. He returned sacred
funds he had saved through his provident living. I have
such respect for him and for what he was taught in his
home.
In today’s world, debt is a terrible problem which robs
families and individuals of self-reliance. We must model
and teach living within our means. As our children were
growing up, during dinner conversations, we tried to
impress upon them the importance of earning interest
rather than paying interest. We taught them that one way
to get ahead is to earn money while they were sleeping.
Interest was the way this happened. It is gratifying to
see our sons and their wives teaching this to their
children. Our son David told us that he took his
seven-year-old daughter Ruby to the bank to put money in
her savings account and explained that she would earn
interest while she was sleeping. A few weeks later
during family home evening, they were discussing how
much money they would need to have for their family
vacation. Ruby said she would help the family earn more
money, and David asked her how she would do that. Ruby
replied, “I will sleep more.” She understood the
principle.
Have you considered how the
spiritual well-being of our sisters is impacted by their
dress and grooming? Are there sisters in your
wards who don’t feel the Spirit as often as they could
because of how they dress? We know of one bishop who
specifically asked that an Enrichment meeting be held
for Relief Society sisters and the young women to
address modesty. Some of the mothers were the most
grievous offenders, and they were oblivious.
In the general Young Women’s meeting, President Hinckley
again emphasized the importance of modesty. We need to
follow the counsel of our prophet. Listen to what he
said: “Modesty in dress and manner will assist in
protecting against temptation. It may be difficult to
find modest clothing, but it can be found with enough
effort. I sometimes wish every girl had access to a
sewing machine and training in how to use it. She could
then make her own attractive clothing. I suppose
this is an unrealistic wish. But I do not hesitate
to say that you can be attractive without being
immodest.”17
What is the standard, sisters? Pose that question in
your Relief Societies. How does modesty influence our
welfare both spiritually and temporally? I hope we won’t
overlook the power of Home, Family, and Personal
Enrichment meetings to meet welfare needs—both spiritual
and temporal.
Self-Reliance
The objective of welfare is to help us become
spiritually and temporally self-reliant. Our temporal
self-reliance increases as we discipline ourselves to
gain an education, to live within our means, to
strengthen our personal work ethic, and to share our
abundance with others. We also have been given the
responsibility to teach self-reliance in our own
families. We can help our family develop temporal
self-reliance as we teach provident living. Our children
learn the way free agency works as we allow them
progressive decision-making responsibility and to
experience the consequences of good and bad choices. If
we make every decision for them, we should not be
surprised if they become adults who struggle with making
good decisions.
I can’t walk away from talking about temporal
self-reliance without talking about work. When I
was called as the Relief Society general president I
said in general conference, “I do know how to work.”18
Work is a key to welfare. Sisters, we can’t be
self-reliant if we don’t know how to work, and we have
to teach our children to work. Teaching the
importance, the joy, and the rewards of work is best
done and modeled in the home. Again, we should not
be surprised if a child who has every chore done for
them develops into an adult without the capacity for or
the love of work.
I would like to end with a few thoughts on spiritual
self-reliance. I believe that spiritual
self-reliance comes as we learn to live and keep the law
of the fast.
In the Church Handbook of
Instructions, Book 2, it reads: “Fasting,
accompanied by prayer, is a form of worship. The Lord
has commanded His people to fast to help them draw close
to Him, overcome worldliness, gain spiritual strength,
increase their compassion, and prepare themselves for
service. Fasting is fundamental to our spiritual
well-being and temporal welfare.”19
One of the most important ways Latter-day Saints can
care for the needy is through fast offerings.
Giving a generous fast offering blesses both the giver
and the receiver. President Hinckley has said, “Think .
. . of what would happen if the principles of fast day
and the fast offering were observed throughout the
world. The hungry would be fed, the naked clothed, the
homeless sheltered. . . . The giver would not suffer but
would be blessed by his small abstinence. A new
measure of concern and unselfishness would grow in the
hearts of people everywhere.”20
Sisters, are we personally living the law of the fast?
Are we teaching it to our families? Are we
testifying of its blessings? Do our sisters in our
wards and stakes understand the importance of living
this law? Teach the law of the fast in a first
Sunday lesson. As a presidency, help your teachers
find ways to teach this very important gospel principle.
A proper fast includes abstaining from food and drink
for two consecutive meals. It also includes
prayerful preparation with a specific focus during the
fast and attendance at fast and testimony meeting.
Making a generous fast offering donation completes our
fast. The fast offering is an important underpinning of
the welfare program. It provides priesthood leaders with
funds to purchase the goods and service which cannot be
obtained through local storehouses and other resources.
The prophet Isaiah teaches about the true law of the
fast with its attendant blessings. As I read from Isaiah
chapter 58 starting with verse 8, listen for the
promises that come as we keep the law of the fast.
“Then shall thy light break forth as the morning, and
thine health shall spring forth speedily: and thy
righteousness shall go before thee; the glory of the
Lord shall be thy rereward.
“Then shalt thou call, and the Lord shall answer; thou
shalt cry, and he shall say, Here I am. If thou take
away from the midst of thee the yoke, the putting forth
of the finger, and speaking vanity;
“And if thou draw out thy soul to the hungry, and
satisfy the afflicted soul; then shall thy light rise in
obscurity, and thy darkness be as the noonday:
“And the Lord shall guide thee continually, and satisfy
thy soul in drought, and make fat thy bones: and thou
shalt be like a watered garden, and like a spring of
water, whose waters fail not.”21
Here are some of the promises I heard. Your
“health shall spring forth speedily,” you can call upon
the Lord and He will answer, your countenance will be as
the “noonday” sun, “the Lord shall guide thee
continually” and “make fat thy bones.” I don’t know—do
you want fat bones? And then the phrase I love the most,
“You shall be like a watered garden, and like a spring
of water, whose waters fail not.” Sisters, why wouldn’t
we want these blessings? They can be ours if we observe
to keep the law of the fast.
President Marion G. Romney gave this promise: “Be
liberal in your giving, that you may grow yourselves.
Don’t give just for the benefit of the poor, but give
for your own welfare. Give enough so that you can
give yourself into the kingdom of God through
consecrating of your means and your time. Pay an
honest tithing and double your fast offerings, if you
want the blessings of heaven: I promise every one of you
who will do it that you will increase your income. The
Lord will reward you according to your deeds.”22
I testify of the blessings that come as you live the law
of the fast.
Sisters, thank you for lifting up the hands that hang
down. Thank you for loving women and their families who
need your tender care. As Relief Society leaders you are
blessed with the privilege to serve and bless others,
but please don’t forget yourself and your family.
Are you applying welfare principles in your own life?
Are you personally self-reliant, both spiritually and
temporally? Do you make time for personal prayer
and scripture study? For physical activity? Y ou
have to take care of yourself in order to care of your
family. Know that you—and your family—are your
first priority. In Mosiah 4:27 the Lord tells us,
“It is not requisite that a man [or woman] should run
faster he [or she] has strength.”
I have confidence in you and I pray for you that you
will know how to meet both the temporal and spiritual
needs of the sisters and families you serve. As
you are privileged to bless others, may you feel the
love of the Lord in you life as you keep your covenants,
exercise charity, and strengthen families.
May God bless you in this great work—the work of Relief
Society—is my prayer, in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.
Endnotes
1. Personal correspondence.
2. Church Handbook of Instructions, Book 2: Priesthood
and Auxiliary Leaders (1998), 194.
3. Church Handbook of Instructions, Book 2, 194.
4. Gordon B. Hinckley, “Standing Strong and Immovable,”
Worldwide Leadership Training Meeting, Jan. 2004, 20–21.
5 Harold B. Lee, welfare agricultural meeting, Oct. 2,
1971.
6. Church Handbook of Instructions, Book 2, 195;
emphasis added.
7. Church Handbook of Instructions, Book 2, 193.
8. Church Handbook of Instructions, Book 2, 195.
9. Personal correspondence.
10. Personal correspondence.
11. Doctrine and Covenants 42:30.
12. Doctrine and Covenants 42:34.
13. Personal correspondence.
14. Glen L. Rudd, Pure Religion: The Story of Church
Welfare since 1930 (1995), 314.
15. Church Handbook of Instructions, Book 2, 196.
16. Church Handbook of Instructions, Book 2, 193.
17. "Stay on the High Road," Ensign, May 2004, 114.
18. In Conference Report, Apr. 2002, 99; or Ensign, May
2002, 84.
19. Church Handbook of Instructions, Book 2, 255–256.
20. In Conference Report, Apr. 1991, 73; or Ensign, May
1991, 52–53.
21. Isaiah 58:8–11.
22. Pure Religion, 377.
My notes
and feelings as Sister Parkin was speaking
(Deb Cox):
• Welfare is significant because it is the Lord’s work.
Welfare system works only with vision and love for those
in our vineyards.
• The more we review the objectives of Relief Society
the more we get the vision of Welfare.
• We need to SEEK out those in need.
• We need to be in a Proactive mode...not a Reactive
mode.
• Do we, as Relief Society Leaders, know what the
concern and vision of our Priesthood leader is?
• Fasting is fundamental to Welfare program. Are we
teaching the principles of the fast and the promises?
Auxiliary Update
Auxiliary update was
conducted by counselors of the General Relief Society
Presidency. Current information regarding Relief Society
was discussed.
Sister Hughs told us that Sister Parkin has a vision and
a focus for the women of the Church and that is for them
to be able to feel the love of the Lord in their lives.
We were asked to pass this on to the women in our wards,
stakes and branches.
Discussed the World Wide Leadership Meeting and the need
of unity in the auxiliaries of the Church in individual
wards. Relief Society needs to reach out to the Young
Women and Primary leaders so as to feel a part of the
Relief Society.
Relief Society Leaders need to reach out to the Young
Women....especially the Laurels...to foster ease in
transition from the Young Women’s program to Relief
Society.
Our presidency members need to be “Co-Workers”. It takes
a team effort to meet the needs of the sisters. What is
a co-worker?
• Works with a common purpose.
• Gives support to other members.
• Is equally yoked to responsibilities.
• Is a team member.
• Listens and communicates thoughts and feelings.
• Helps other members.
• Enlarges the perspective of others by participation.
• Helps the priesthood leaders know the perspective of
women.
Are we teaching our Relief Society sisters that we, as
their leaders, are covenant women?
Are we participating in all the
meetings & committees that are
required of us?
Stake
Relief Society Presidencies
-
Stake RS
Presidency Meeting - All members of the presidency
meets at least monthly to assess the needs and
concerns of sisters and ward RS leaders in the Stake.
(Handbook pg
200)
-
Stake
President Meeting - The Stake RS President meets
regularly (usually monthly) with the Stake President
to receive direction from him and to counsel with him
on issues pertaining to the sisters in the stake.
-
Read
Handbook pages 195, 196 and 200 for additional
information on meetings.
Ward
Relief Society Presidencies
-
Ward
Council - Ward RS President
-
Ward
Welfare Committee - All members of the RS Presidency
(handbook pg
196)
-
Bishop
Meeting - Ward Relief Society President meets
regularly...at least monthly to evaluate women’s
needs.
(Handbook pg
201)
Be prepared for a meeting with the Bishop.
-
Ward RS
Presidency Meeting - All members of the presidency
meet regularly, usually weekly if possible.
Read page 200-201 of
handbook for purposes and objectives of this meeting.
-
Ward RS
Leadership Meeting - All sisters who serve in RS
callings are invited to attend. Meetings are called by
the RS presidency as needed.
(Handbook page 201)
-
Review
pages 201-202 for additional meetings.
Counseling With Our Councils
In our Relief Society (RS) Presidency meetings we should
counsel to know the needs of each of the sisters.
Presidency should arrange visits into each of the homes
of the sisters. Stake RS Presidents should be
having regular interviews with the ward RS President to
understand the needs of the sisters in the stake.
It is the stake leaders responsibility to get to know
all the sisters in the stake. Do not be satisfied
with the outer appearance of the sister’s needs.
Do not assume that because everything LOOKS
okay.....that it is. Seek and find out the needs
of each of the sisters in your stewardship. Sister
Parkin was quoted as saying, “Good information makes for
good inspiration.” Find ways to seek out “good
information”.
A Demographic Study
of the sisters in your area could be prepared in your
wards and then turned into the stake RS presidency. Some
examples on what could be included in your demographic
study are: 1) Number of widowed
sisters. 2) Number of divorced sisters with
children. 3) How many women have children in home
under age five. 4) How many young women in
the ward will be turning 18 this year....etc.
A study like this could help you understand the needs in
your ward and stake. You will be able to
gear your lessons, your activities and your Home, Family
and Personal Enrichment (HFPE) meetings along the needs
of those in your area. Such as...if your demographic
study shows that you have a majority of women in the
ward who have children under the age of five years old
you will realize how important a children’s class is for
your HFPE meetings so that these sisters can attend. You
will know that there must be mini classes included to
enrich these sisters in this season of their lives as
they are raising young children. You will understand
that first Sunday lessons need to be geared on topics
that will strengthen young marriages, young mothers and
priority issues.
Another way of seeking out good
information is in the form of surveys.
Surveys can
be used to find out the spiritual needs of the sisters
as you pray for guidance over first Sunday lessons.
Surveys can be instrumental in finding activities and
lessons that the sisters are interested in for Home,
Family and Personal Enrichment. It can also be a
way of finding out talents in sisters and how to utilize
those talents by sharing them in HFPE meetings.
Personal Note from Deb:
The above thought brought to my mind two things that I
have experienced. The first thing was an idea that was
shared by Sister Sheri Dew a few years ago in a Relief
Society Open House Workshop. She suggested we find
a pretty glass container and cut some pastel paper
strips. At the first Sunday lesson of the
year, tell the sisters that we will be working on ways
of strengthening OUR sisters in the ward that year.
Ask them to anonymously write on two slips of paper,
something that they are struggling with, something they
would like to learn or something that they feel needs to
be addressed to strengthen and unify OUR Relief Society
sisters. When they were finished they were to put
their slips of paper in the container and as the
presidency would pray for guidance on what should be
shared in Sunday lessons or Home, Family and Personal
Enrichments or even with personal presidency visits,
they would take out a few slips of suggestions and try
to implement ways on meeting those needs.
Also, this brought to mind how a survey had brought an
inactive sister into activity. Because of a Home,
Family and Personal Enrichment survey, I found out that
a certain sister who was totally inactive had a unique
talent. I gave this sister a personal visit and
asked her if she would help out with a Home, Family and
Personal Enrichment mini class. She accepted and because
of the love and acceptance of the sisters that evening,
she and her husband are now active and she is enjoying
friendships in Relief Society.
Counseling with Priesthood Leaders - Stake President and
Bishop
Regular meetings with our priesthood leaders is
recommended - at least monthly. Stake and Ward Relief
Society Presidents - if your Stake President or Bishop
have not scheduled a meeting between the two of you for
the month, take it upon yourself to call the executive
secretary to arrange one. Be consistent with your
meetings. Value your Stake President or Bishop’s time.
Come to the meeting prepared with an agenda which has
been prepared from information you have received by
counseling with your Relief Society presidency members.
In your presidency meetings you have discussed the needs
of your ward sisters, have come up with ideas to meet
those needs and now you, as the RS president, can take
that to your stake president or bishop to counsel with
him and discuss your presidency’s plans in regards to
meeting the sisters needs and in what ways his
priesthood leadership and counsel can help you in
implementing those plans.
Below is an example of an agenda you could use in your
meeting with your priesthood leader.
1. Prayer
2. Share successes in meeting needs
3. Observation of needs
4. Concerns
5. Recommendations from RS president
6. Counsel and recommendations from stake president or
bishop
7. Schedule your next meeting
And most important: Stay within the allotted meeting
time!
Young Adult Sisters - Sister
Pingree
There is a strong concern from the First Presidency and
from the Council of the Twelve that our young adult
women have not been taught and are missing the
basics in regards to
self-reliance. Sister Hughs was dressed
in an apron and held up an iron. Pointing to the
iron, Sister Pingree asked, “Do you know what this is?
Do you know what to do with it? Do you know how to
use it? Do your young adult women know?” She
then went on to say that many young adult women do not
know the basic skills of cooking, nutrition, home
cleaning, budgeting.....just the basics!! They
have missed this critical instruction.
Many do not know how to even sew on a button, sew a hem,
sew up a slit in a skirt. She informed us that right now
the Missionary Training Center has had to hire full time
seamstresses because many of our missionary daughters
don’t know how to even sew on a button. Many young women
are entering the MTC with slits in their skirts that
must be sewn up in order to be modest and these young
women do not have the skills to do this.
Many young adult women do not know how to clean and
organize a home. They need to be taught basic
cooking and nutrition. They have not learned how
to budget their money and many are in terrible bondage
by going into credit card debt at an early age.
Dress and Grooming
- Sister Pingree said that she had just attended a
meeting with President Hinckley where he expressed,
“What is happening to our young women and grooming?”
He expressed that he was appalled at the frumpiness of
our young women. “Their clothing is wrinkled and
frumpy...Do they know how to use an iron?” was his
remarks. Sister Pingree said that the casualness
of dressing is being carried into our temples. There
have been reports and comments of women wearing flip
flop sandals not only to our Sunday worship meetings but
even into our temples. Our young adult women are
not the only offenders of this.....they are most likely
learning this casualness from the examples of their
mothers. We need to teach our young women and
their mothers how to dress modestly and
appropriately....not just in our temples and in our
churches but in our daily lives as we interact with
those who will judge our commitment to our Lord by our
outward appearance.
Other Auxiliary Information and Instruction
Home, Family and Personal Enrichment (HFPE)
- Along with the
ideas that have been mentioned above, Sister Pingree
gave these additional suggestions:
Balance -
There needs to be a balance when planning and
implementing HFPE. There are too many humanitarian
projects being implemented. Humanitarian service is
necessary and crucial to meeting the needs of our
brothers and sisters in other areas...BUT...we should be
finding ways to “meet the needs of the women across the
street before provide for those across the world”. The
basic skills are being overlooked for the convenience of
putting together humanitarian kits. To simplify is
good...but we must not be to simple that we overlook the
individual needs of the sisters in our stewardship. A
variety of classes should be given so as to meet the
needs for age, cultural, skill level, concerns from
priesthood leaders, etc. The main concern communicated
over and over again by Sister Pingree was......Teach our
sisters and young women self- reliance!! Teach them the
Basics!!
Relief
Society Themes - There should not be
yearly themes that will cause Relief Society
presidencies to be so concerned about sticking to their
theme that they miss providing lessons, classes,
activities that will meet the sisters needs. Sister
Pingree stated that we should be organized with our
plans but flexible at any given moment to receive
inspiration and follow the promptings of the Spirit on
what should be shared to strengthen the women and their
families. Trying to adhere strictly to a specific theme
for the entire year could take away that flexibility
when a need arises.
Reciting
the Relief Society Declaration - Sister
Pingree instructed us that Relief Society sisters are
NOT to stand and
repeat the Relief Society Declaration as the young women
do with the Young Women’s Motto. The Declaration is a
profound document that tells the world who we are,
Daughters of a living Father in Heaven and expresses
what we stand for and believe in. It is important that
each of us understand the Declaration but we have been
instructed by the First Presidency that we are
NOT to stand and
recite it.
Resources
-
Living
Essential program on welfare issues - check in stake
libraries for videos.
-
Women’s
Conferences on DVD’s and video tapes. Most stake
libraries will have them.
-
World Wide
Leadership meeting, January 2004 DVD -
USE IT!!
It is powerful scripture from our priesthood leaders
for women of our day and for our Relief Society
organization.
Conclusion
Relief Society is not like any other organization on the
face of the earth. It is the Lord’s organization for
women. President Boyd K. Packer said: “...you
belong to the largest and by all measure the
greatest women’s organization on earth. I quote the
Prophet Joseph Smith when he and the Brethren organized
the Relief Society: ‘I now turn the key in behalf of all
women’. This society is organized ‘according to
your natures’. … You are now placed in a situation
in which you can act according to those sympathies
‘within you’. …If you live up to these privileges,
the angels cannot be restrained from being your
associates. …If this Society listens to the counsel of
the Almighty, through the heads of the Church, they
shall have power to command queens in their midst.”
Boyd K. Packer, “The Relief Society,” Ensign, May 1998,
72
Listen to the powerful phrases from President Gordon B.
Hinckley concerning women and the Relief Society
organization in the World Wide Leadership meeting,
January 2004:
-
Stand
strong and immovable for that which is correct and
proper under the Lord’s plan.
-
There is no
organization anywhere to match the Relief Society of
this Church.
-
If women
will be united and speak with one voice, their
strength will be incalculable.
-
Stand
together for righteousness.
-
Be teachers
and guardians of our daughters.
-
“I see this
as the one bright shining hope in a world that is
marching toward self-destruction.”
President Hinckley
We were
counseled to....Teach these concepts to the women
of the Church!
Notes taken by Deb Cox,
March 2004
Welfare Workshop:
The Eternal Well-Being of God's Children
Welfare is temporal and spiritual well-being.
Relief Society follows the pattern of Jesus of saving
souls and providing for the welfare of women. Our
purpose is to bring sisters and families unto Christ.
Welfare is more than the Bishop giving food and
financial assistance. It is the total well-being
of God's children.
Identify welfare principles to help us in our
responsibility of providing help to women and families
in need. We are to:
-
Help make the first step so that they can make the
second.
-
There are
many women who could provide help.
-
Seek out
those who are in need. Be watchful.
-
Follow up
with the person after a welfare need has been
provided.
-
Temporal
welfare gives opportunity to strengthen our spiritual
welfare.
-
There
needs to be a willingness to accept help.
-
Be
sensitive to know when a person is ready to accept
help.
-
Teach our
sisters not to look for help in the wrong places.
Look to the Lord and His programs first!
What
do 12 sisters have to offer in a welfare cause?
We were given an example of a welfare need: A
young mother is going through a rough time. She
has small children at home.....one is an infant 18
months old and the other is a 4 year old. She
doesn't know how to cook foods from the Bishops
Storehouse. Fast foods and prepared foods have
been her only food staples. Her 18 month old is
still on a liquid diet because she feels that is all he
needs. Her home is in disarray and she has not
attended Church for many months. Her bills were
unopened and scattered in many places. She had
signs of depression.
After we
were given the example, we were told that we were all
gathered into this sisters ward. What one specific
talent, ability or resource could you personally offer
this sister in need? We were asked to stand and
share our talent, ability or resource....twelve sisters
responded....many more were holding up there hands to
respond. Here are some answers:
-
An older
sister with health issues said that she could offer
prayers for the young woman and her family.
-
A
listening ear.
-
An
unconditional acceptance of her and her situation.
Be a friend.
-
An
understanding heart.
-
Show
love.
-
A woman
who loves to cook said that she could teach cooking
skills. Help her with understanding proper
nutrition for her children.
-
An
accountant said she could help with her
finances...budgeting her money, showing her how to
organize her bills and paying them.
-
Ability
to show compassion and be there to listen.
-
An older
sister with no family at home expressed that the
greatest resource she has right now is HER TIME!
She could share it.
-
Another
sister said she is an awesome housecleaner. She
could give some home management ideas, help with some
laundry, etc.
-
An older
sister loves children....she could babysit so the
young sister could get a break and do something for
herself.
-
Someone
offered to help the sister at Church with her children
if that is what is causing the inactivity.
The Lord's Storehouse
The Lord's Storehouse is set up to meet the needs of
each unit of the Church. As we bring assistance to
those in our area we help with the Lord's
Storehouse....(refer back to the above story of 12
sisters)
We were
asked what challenges are we facing in our wards and
stakes. These are a few of the remarks from the
women in the audience.
-
Employment - Sisters raising children alone.
-
Underemployment - Cannot provide adequately for the
family on the income they are receiving.
-
Aging
sisters in need of assistance.
-
Mental
and emotional illness.
-
Reluctance to become self-reliant. Chronic
dependency.
-
Lack of
adequate job training.
-
Basic
personal habits and grooming.
-
Basic
social skills.
-
Poor
sense of self worth.
-
Military
service.
What is our own personal welfare
responsibility? Answer: To become self reliant.
Heavenly Father does not do for us what we can do for
ourselves. Becoming self reliant is a life long
endeavor. We need to strive to become self reliant
in the Six Areas of Welfare:
-
Education
& Literacy....that includes computer literacy.
-
Employment
-
Physical
Health
-
Resource
Management - Financial
-
Home
Storage and Emergency Preparedness
-
Social,
Emotional and Spiritual
The resources are there for us
to be strengthened....right in our own wards. What
does Relief Society give to those in need?
-
Through
Home, Family and Personal
Enrichment classes we learn skills that can
strengthen our self worth and abilities. We see,
we learn and we experience ideas that give us the
small push to say to ourselves..."Okay, I can do
this!" It may be as simple as planning a Family
Home Evening or baking a casserole.
-
Relief
Society gives a feeling of Sisterhood....of
friendship.
-
Relief
Society is a safe place for a woman struggling.
-
A place
to go for compassion and understanding.
-
Relief
Society creates and environment for women to feel
comfortable to share burdens.
Remember...if you offer your help, follow through
immediately.
With the
same example of the young mother with welfare needs, we
discussed how we would seek out her needs if she was not
being vocal of them and then meet those needs.
Here are some of the remarks.
- Make home visits to assess the needs.
- Really listen to the needs and wants of the sister
and the Spirit will guide as we reach out.
- Get to know the women in your ward on an
individual basis.
- Meet needs before they become welfare problems.
- Showing sisterly concern and love will create a
safe environment to share welfare needs.
How can Relief Society presidents
ASSESS without
trying to SOLVE the
welfare problems?
- First know your Bishops vision of providing
welfare.
- Assess the needs of the individual first.
- Remember the proper self reliance pattern and
teach that to your sisters. First we should rely
on ourselves, then our family, next take the problem
to our Church leaders and then if there is still a
welfare need...take it to a community service.
- Help families find their own solutions before
offering advise or help. Be there with a
listening ear and guide the individual into thinking
out the problem and maybe even solving it themselves
by just having someone to share it with.
- Assign visiting teachers that can strengthen the
sister. Knowing your ward sisters will make it
easier to know who will make good visiting teachers to
this sister.
- It is imperative that you work closely with your
Bishop. He may know some things that you were
not aware of and you may assess some needs that he was
not aware of .
- Work with other organizations in the ward to
provide assistance. For example: the family may
have a girl in the Young Women's program that may need
some extra guidance or be taught a certain skill.
Relay this to your Young Women's leader and ask her to
assess the young woman's needs.
- Enlist the help and suggestions from all ward
leaders in your welfare meeting. With priesthood
leaders in attendance, they can make suggestions on
how they can help this family.
- Suggest ways that Home, Family and Personal
Enrichment meetings can meet individual needs without
putting the focus on one sister. Suggest mini
classes, ways to fellowship, etc.
- Always remember that you do not have to fix the
welfare needs of a woman and her family yourself.
Your calling is to assess the needs and provide ways
through programs or other people to meet those needs.
- Always remember to follow up! Always expect
those who have been providing help to report
back...especially the visiting teachers. Teach
then to report back and to follow up.
- Always finds ways to make the sister feel that she
is loved and that there is hope!
Resource
Essentials of Welfare Video - "Caring for the
Needy"
Church Distribution Center or could already be in your
ward libraries.
As leaders,
are you willing to pay the price to find out the
welfare needs of the women under your stewardship?
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